Sunday, March 13, 2011

SENSEX and the Opposite Sex!

For the past few weeks there are two things I have been doing with dedication. One of them is to follow the SENSEX and invest my virtual money in it. The other is to follow the ‘Birds’ (Cute Chicks), as my friend calls it, on the campus, on FB, on the phone or on any other medium of interaction possible.

This Sunday morning, as I woke up alone in my room and picked up the copy of Economic Times lying on the floor, I had some weird similarities between these two distinct subjects cropping up in my mind. Let me share them with you.

'Bird Hunting' by applying Stock Fundas!

One of the basic investment strategies is to invest early and long in fundamentally strong stocks. People who would have invested in Reliance, Infosys etc. say 4-5 years back surely would have made a lot of money by now. The same strategy applies to these ‘Birds’. You have to identify the fundamentally strong ‘Birds’ (Those who have the right mix of Beauty and Brains!) early and invest long in them. I say early because if you don’t have a fundamentally strong ‘Bird’ in your cage by the time you are in class 11 or 12 then the chances of you finding one are diminishing by the day!

Investors are advised to ‘Cherry Pick’ their stocks according to their budget and risk profile. Likewise you too need to ‘Cherry Pick’ your ‘Birds’, according to your personality and taste. Just like you don't put your money on every stock listed on the SENSEX, don't try and hit on every 'Bird' on the Radar. If you pick someone way out of your league, it is more likely that the 'Bird' would use you, burn a hole in your pocket and then finally dump you!

Before investing in any stock you are advised to take a good look at the P/E ratio (Price/Equity ratio), Balance sheet and Dividends of the stock. Similarly, before you hit on any ‘Bird’ do analyse her ‘S/A ratio’ (Sex Appeal/Attitude ratio). Scrutinise her ‘Balance sheets’ i.e.  Family background (Make sure that she doesn’t have any rowdy brother or a mafia don father!), Past relationships (If any) etc. Most importantly, estimate and calculate your ‘Dividends’ (you all know what I mean by this ryt?).

Just like the prices of stocks fluctuate on the SENSEX, the ratings of these ‘Birds’ also fluctuate on the Opposite Sex’s Radar. The minute we see a cute girl, wearing a sexy outfit, swaggering in the canteen we have a ‘BUY’ call on her. We have scores of Boys taking the ‘Buy’ call and investing their time and money trying to hit on the girl. Soon she is “The THING” in the campus. The next week/month when we hear the news that she is now committed with an ‘X’ guy, we have a ‘SELL’ call on her.

Right now we have a recession of these ‘Birds’ on the campus. May be like the government influxes liquidity in the market by tweaking interest rates, the admin needs to influx liquidity in the campus by tweaking reservation policies!

For now its M@verick signing off!!! :)

P.S. All you girls who read this post... Don't misunderstand that i think of you as 'Birds'... Its just one of my fantasy posts! If I like anyone of you... it's b'coz I like you from my heart... My heart doesn't know any fundas of investment, trading, profits... It knows only the funda of Love!


  1. loved reading it ... :)
    nd PS part shows u seriously don't want to jeopardize ur BIRD hunt ... nice ..I get it ... lol

  2. Yeah i don't want 2 jeopardize my 'Bird Hunt'... iske bina kaam hi kya hai??