Selfish Or Selfless???

The ‘Race’ is on and the ‘runners’ are running faster than they ever have. Some of the runners are professionalized-amateurs who can see nothing but the finish line. Some of them are running just because they have to and don’t care a damn about the result. They are just content with being a sportive participant.

Then, there are runners like me, who were in the race initially but lost course in the middle because they couldn’t understand why they were running after all, and now don’t know whether to continue running or take a break and change track.

I see that my legs are moving, yet I am going nowhere, because I am practically running at the same place.  When I see the runners, who put on their ‘roller skates’ and skated fast enough to beat us by almost  a mile, I ask myself weren’t you and they equals at one point of time?

The answer is an obvious one.

As I frantically try to find a scapegoat I could do no better than to look at my own feet.  Oh! This was easier than I thought… I didn’t have proper footwear!

My twice repaired and now torn Woodland sandals which I had bought in my first year and my now sole less Addidas shoes signify my dilapidated condition. I am so lazy and afraid of the worst that I could neither get them repaired nor replaced, but have been switching from one to the other so that neither of them gets completely redundant.

What’s with this new miserly attitude of mine ah? I refuse to spend even an iota of money, (I don’t have much of it either!) even for my basic amenities. Earlier, I had a crispy wallet but now it’s an empty one. Sign of things to come? Where has it all gone? I know it will comeback…but when?

It continues to rain here and despite knowing the repercussions I continue to get drenched in the it each and every time. The sails of my ship are torn and the ship will very soon be scuttled... but I still remember each and every comment on your facebook profile photo…why???

A place I once considered ‘Heaven’ and wanted to return to as soon as I left it is no longer as alluring as it was. The inmates are giving the hints one by one and to the best of my abilities I am correctly interpreting them.

On top of all this I have this silly question cropping up in my mind…

Have I become more selfish or selfless???

Or

Should I become more selfish or selfless???

Any answers?????